Answer this one question as you step into the New YearDec 30, 2021
As you step into the New Year, you may start reflecting on 2021 and on what 2022 may bring. You may get into your feelings and have vague thoughts around your desires (i.e. I just want everything to go back to normal). Nothing too specific because maybe you don’t really know what they are. Or maybe you do and they seem unattainable at the moment, or you don’t believe in goals and resolutions, or you believe that you’ll know when you stumble upon them.
I’m not asking about your goals and desires today. Here’s my question to you:
What’s the one story that you have about yourself that you’re willing to let go of as you step into 2022?
As a child, I felt like I had to meet a lot of conditions in order to be deserving of my parent’s love. At some point they felt unattainable and I gave up. This impacted the work I was willing to put into my future relationships. To the extent that it did would take me decades to realize. My reasons for creating the space between me and others always felt legit (the ego is very clever), but they prevented me from experiencing a level of openness with others that would help me (and them) feel fully connected and nourished. It caused me to have to work harder than necessary to find joy because I didn’t do the deep, connective work. I was too busy protecting myself.
I’m sharing this now because you’re important to me, and in these times, the most critical thing we can all do is to authentically connect. You opened my email. You got this far in reading what I’m sharing. Thank you. This isn’t lost on me, so I want to let you in.
I’m going to share a bit more as a way to further challenge myself as well as you, because I know I’m not the only one with this story.
The truth is, I already thought I let my story go.
And to an extent, I had. But as I reflect, I realize that the hurt I felt in my life were from the losses of what could have been had I done the hard work with the people and the opportunities I truly cared about. I was still focused on the misalignments (that we weren't on the same page), and the part that was lost on me was that I really cared about them. It was a deeply embedded habit I didn't know I was still operating under, and I was denying myself and others the full experience. So,
I’m letting go of my story that I need to earn love. I’m letting go of my deeply embedded story that love is quid pro quo. (intellectually I knew this, but not really). This means I can fully assume the life that I want without wondering if I’ve earned it. I can move forward knowing that I am deserving.
Can you relate? Will you do this with me?
What’s your story that you’re willing to let go of?
P.S. If you’re willing to get vulnerable with me, share your answer to that question. I absolutely want to know. I want to put you on my vision board to support your systemic intention for the new year. Let’s connect by getting real. We can do this together.